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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in theskunkrocker's LiveJournal:

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    Tuesday, May 12th, 2009
    12:47 pm
    I believe the traditional gaming industry is being threatened. Everything nowadays is entering the digital age and while it isn't going to immediately destroy the way of life for wargamers and dungeon masters it does look bleak for the next generations. At work I recently opened up an issue of some magazine and had a look inside to discover that Settlers of Catan is now on X-Box Live Arcade. A few months ago, Steve Jackson showed me a new iPhone application he and members of his staff were working on that was a promotional item for the card game Munchkin. Digital PDFs of entire role playing catalogs is becoming not only an easy way of getting out of print books but the norm for pretty much everything. World of Warcraft and Everquest and other mmorpgs take the imagination out of Dungeons and Dragons and allow you to do the same things much faster without even having to roll for initiative. Video game versions of classic games have seemingly become more popular than their counterparts because while it's hard to find a group of people locally to play Uno with, you can simply jump on your X-Box and find three random players around the world.

    If you were to drive down the road and end up in my home town of Chattanooga, Tennessee, and visit a little fun place called Dicehead Games off of Lee Highway, between the Indian buffet and the workout center, and walk in generally at any time of day you'd a couple of guys playing Warmachine in the back with their carefully painted figures and everyone else there playing video games. On a saturday night, you'd find the place chock full of wargamers and card players, with dice rolling and mana being tapped, but also with every XBox, Playstation 3, and Wii in the joint being used and abused. If you were to see who is playing these games it's not people who don't do traditional gaming, but those who gave up on it. Roleplayers, those who can't get a decent campaign in a D20 system going to save their life, sitting in the back playing Resident Evil 5. A few Munchkin players sitting up in the front; one is playing Rock Band 2 and tapping buttons furiously to the latest DLC Harmonix has to offer while the other two are chainsawing their way through hordes of Locust on Gears of War 2. Ken furiously beating the ever loving crap out of Chun Li on Street Fighter 4 for the Playstation 3, but it's not just any gamer playing: he's one of the many wargamers in the store, simply without a match to play anyone against. The Wii? Yu Gi Oh players beating each other up on Smash Brothers, mainly because the place is filled with Magic Players. Rather than play the games they came to play, they gave up on finding players, and instead decided to beat the stupid out of Pikachu.

    This isn't what traditional gaming used to be about. You used to walk into any nerd store and find players sitting around bored, and asked them if they wanted to play something and their reaction would be along the lines of "Sure! Anything!" You'd teach them a new game, and they'd love it, and want to play more, and you'd spend all night and even partly after the store is closed begging the owner to not shut you down until after the game, giving you those last precious moments to defeat the Plutonium Dragon and make it to level 10 and take the victory in stride.

    Alas, this isn't the case any longer. The roleplaying bookshelf is covered in dust. The comics barely get looked at. Boxes upon boxes of armies ready to be painted and unleashed on their enemies sit waiting to be purchased, but their art is fading in the sunlight. The paint bottles are drying up. The board games have sat so long their boxes are sagging. A stack of promotional items, free to whoever wants them, fall off the counter, and some guy picks them up on his way over to get batteries for his XBox controller and ignores the lack of a price tag. The guy behind the counter barely looks up from his laptop, connected to the wifi, because he's so enthralled at his current game of World Of Warcraft.

    I don't like this. Not that I have anything against video games. I'll go into the store, and play a vicious game of Halo against some nine year old who can kick my ass, or get together with friends and rock out on Guitar Hero World Tour. And I know it's helping keep the store owners in business; they're good people, this is how they make a living, and I support that. What I don't like about it is one day... it won't be there anymore.

    The future I imagine is complex but simple. A guy is sitting at his school at a lunch table and pulls out a small metal box. The kid across from him does the same. The boxes suddenly light up, turn on, and display between them a 3D landscape, holographic of course. Instead of a deck of cards, each plugs in a USB flash drive. They hold up almost PDA like controllers, with stylus in hand, and furiously back and forth click on "cards" and a battle ensuses on the "screens" between the players. Other kids watching cheer them on as monster fights monster a la the 3D chess game from Star Wars: A New Hope.

    "Why Skunk? Why is this so bad? That sounds kinda cool!"

    Because the imagination is gone. You don't have to picture what this battle looks like in your mind. A video game does all the work for you. These same kids won't have the drive to write an E-Book. They won't have the brainpower to compose music as good as a complex mathmatical equation would. They'll never learn how to draw, because they could simply take a picture of anything they wanted and simply digitize it through Photoshop filters. I'm simply creative because when I was a kid, and that makes me feel old saying that, we had to imagine our adventures. We had to run around with sticks, smacking them back and forth in the woods while standing on a fallen tree, but in our minds we were dread pirates fighting over plundered booty. You want that now? Play the Pirates of the Caribbean video game. Same shit, no thought process required. Might as well get all of those implants put in too, so you can join the rest of the coppertops in the Matrix.
    Friday, January 30th, 2009
    11:42 pm
    ...I feel better now...

    Everything is fine people, I'm okay you're okay, let's all be okay together...

    Sometimes all it takes it a really really really hard dose of reality straight from an unexpected source to set your perspective straight.
    2:06 am
    I used to believe in karma...

    ...karma doesn't exist, people. I know.
    If you do good things, life just kicks you in the ass, but if you do bad things you'll get everything you ever wanted.

    Bonnie, Jamie, Debbie, Rick? Enjoy your jobs I worked so fucking hard to get and never did. I guess it goes to show the more you treat people like shit the better off your life will be. Meanwhile, the rest of us can fucking rot in hell.

    I don't believe in karma. If you do good things... no one cares.

    /emo
    Wednesday, January 28th, 2009
    7:57 am
    Social Meme
    I saw this and thought it was interesting...


    Social Meme
    Instructions: List the five people you see the most often/spend the most time with and something random about them. Then, add a random quote you've said to them recently.

    1. Emily - My girlfriend who I love dearly.
    "Um... I better go... there is a line forming at Subway and I've got like five minutes left on my break."

    2. Christina - Met her at college, instant friends. Awesome chick.
    "Your computer is broken?"

    3. Mel - Runs local game store; totally awesome.
    "I still haven't played Killer Bunnies, but I should. Looks adorable!"

    4. Ginger - Runs parties at local cons, keeps me from getting too drunk. Love her to death.
    "Surprise me, sweetie."

    5. Sheila - One of the managers at work. <3 <3 <3
    "Are you going out for a smoke?"
    Monday, January 26th, 2009
    9:08 pm
    Adrian the Fluffy Puppy shits on Skunks lap and snuggles in close "Heya Skunky :D"
    Adrian the Fluffy Puppy: ... Sits, Dear god
    Skunkrocker: O_O
    Skunkrocker: WORST TYPO EVER
    Æsher: HAHAHAHHA!
    Stalker: LOL
    Adrian the Fluffy Puppy: ._.
    Adrian the Fluffy Puppy: Lol
    Æsher: I'm sure Adrian
    NM Jeff: <#
    NM Jeff: <3
    Skunkrocker: omfg
    Stalker: interesting stuff going on ehre today xD
    Skunkrocker: I have to save that.
    [FSNA] Owashii puts a sticker that reads "TEH FAIL" on Adrian's forehead
    RumRunner: \o/ the shading and re-defining of edges and lines is complete!!
    Skunkrocker: That is going in my LJ.
    Sunday, December 21st, 2008
    9:59 pm
    Cleaning out the closet in my room which hasn't been cleaned out in... YEARS... like... literally... almost a decade...

    Things I found:
    - My skunk keychain!
    - My furry distractor (gold and silver tinsel)
    - Four CRT monitors, three computer cases, two motherboards, and a tree. No bird.
    - A DILDO o_o
    - Quite a number of chains, STRAPS, and LEATHER BANDS o_O
    - WOMENS CLOTHES O_O (was I on drugs when I was younger or did someone put this shit here thinking it would never be found? I think when I was like 12 I was someone's sex slave and didn't know it)
    - Another NES! (I didn't know I had 2!)
    - A guitar! (shh, it's a christmas present)
    - A Razor scooter
    - Lots of old books!
    - A MACHETE! >:3
    - BALLS! Golf balls! A whole bag of them!
    - Jumper cables!
    - About 5000 cds
    - A wig!
    - My old Magic Deck!
    - Psycho Mantis, Gir, Jason Vorhees, about 40 stuffed animals, and a TRAIN! (booyah!)
    - My DJ cds. (boring)
    - Lots of clothes and bookbags and folders and shit from school (dating all the way back to fucking 8th grade, ten years ago! That's how I know it's been a decade)
    - GOLF CLUBS (I haven't gotten those out yet, they're still under more shit)
    - A box consisting of wires, computer parts, and a half eaten poptart
    - A nastified bag of candy (it leaked too)
    - Photographs and negatives
    - So far, four Atari games, haven't found the rest yet
    - Tools
    - Old mountain dew and pepsi cans before they changed their logo.
    - Cassette tapes! A whole bag
    - A hockey mask
    - A midi piano (One of those Miracle Keyboards for the NES)

    But so far my favorite thing that I've found... something I've been looking for over five years...

    The parts of my old half assed fursuit I made out of a hoodie as a halloween costume one year! It's my skunk fur, and if I could just get some more black I could remake my skunk hoodie! And everyone wants that, I'm sure! It just needs a good washing. How does one wash faux fur?
    Friday, December 5th, 2008
    2:04 am
    You know, there are times in my life... I have a really bad week. Like a really bad week. Usually during this week sometime I will have the worst day of my life so far.

    Things just went bad this week.

    First off, one of my better friends who care deeply about has been treating me like shit for quite some time now. I just figured, ya know, that's life. Everyone has problems, he's just having a few bad days. Then bad weeks. Now bad months. I finally lost it on monday. After calming down and taking some honestly good advice from a buddy of mine, I decided to talk to this friend. I cared about him deeply and wanted everything to work out. He flat out told me he didn't want to talk about it. In an effort to reason him I called up said buddy who is also a friend of his and put him on the phone. Friend promptly hung up on his ass. That was the straw that broke the camels back and hurt my feelings to a point of no return. Whenever I think about this friend and how he has treated me I either get angry or I start crying. He came into work today with his girlfriend, who I hope her and I are still friends but I doubt that very much mainly because she's really cool but more importantly she and I work together. I got so angry seeing him there because of the bad day I had (I'll explain in a bit) and then that... I punched a shelf of clothes and cut myself pretty badly, like blood everywhere badly. I had to clean the shelves and my cut for a while and didn't get much done. Luckily I didn't break anything, merchandise wise or my hand. I suppose it's truely nothing to get angry about. But it hurts so much to think about how he just didn't want me to exist in his life anymore even though I cared about him like a brother. I don't know what I did to make him hate me so much but... whatever... it's in the past and one day I'll get over it and it'll be no big deal. It's just that for the first time in a very long time, almost six years, I have contemplated suicide. Right after he shoved me out of his life wednesday I just wanted to turn around, go to the river, park my car, rip out my throat, and jump into the river so no one would ever find me. My fear of death prevents me from doing such things but for a few hours it felt like the only decision left. And that's sad that I let someone have that much of an influence over my life.

    During the week I asked a friend out. He said no. It hurt, but it was no big deal. It wasn't something to get upset about. But then he and I got into a huge argument and I told him that he doesn't let anyone finish what they're saying. Tonight a coworker told me the same thing about me. I couldn't understand it. Then I realized I don't realize when I do this. It made me feel really horrible because I had yelled at my friend about the same thing when it's something I think everyone is guilty of now. It puts things into a prospective I never thought about before. Luckily the argument has proven that a relationship between my friend and me wouldn't work out.

    I hung out with another friend of mine yesterday. He and I have sort of been seeing each other unofficially. It hurts whenever I'm around him because he has a significant other that isn't me yet I feel so close to him. But I don't want to hurt his feelings. Last night at his apartment his parents called while we were in the middle of fun. I ran off promising him that I would be ready for more when I got back after his parents left but... I couldn't do it. I can't do it anymore. I feel like sometimes he just uses me for sex and pays me money to keep me happy when I feel depressed that our friendship seems like a relationship but it's so one sided.

    Today I had a meeting at school at 8:45 with one of my professors. I tried to start my car. Dead battery. I had to wait for my uncle to show up at 9:10 with jumper cables. Jump the car off, I ran to go to a friends house to drop off his wallet that somehow ended up in my jacket bizarrely enough. I stop off at a gas station, pump gas, and then the car won't start again. The alternator was charging the engine, but not the battery, meaning that I'd have to get another jump just to get home. Unfortunately the guy who gave me the jump, nice guy and all, but he was in a bit of a hurry I suppose and wouldn't let the battery charge for more than a few seconds before asking me to start it. I got him talking about politics just to get him to ignore the car for at least a few minutes and sure enough it popped right over... except it was an hour later and I was late for class. I just went straight home. The worst part was when this shit happened I was in a stupid hurry and didn't want to roll down my window to see outside of the car since the window was soaked in rain drops. Instead, I left the door open and backed out trying not to hit anything. Unfortunately, while with the door completely open I was clearing my dad's van fine I forgot about the bumper which sticks out about three inches and I put a dent in it and fucked up my door. Anyway, I had to get a ride to school from my friend who came by to get the wallet and we jetted. I wanted him to take me to work too and he said he'd try. I told him since his gas hand was low he should stop first at this one gas station. He said it'd be fine, dropped me off, I went to class. I get into class, come to find out that sketchbooks are due and I didn't bring mine because I thought they were due next tuesday during my final. Leaving class, I call my friend and he's out of gas somewhere in Chattanooga and is waiting for his mom and he has to drive somewhere else before he can pick me up. I end up having a buddy give me a ride simply to get to work on time, unfortunately I had to pay him ten bucks for the gas since he lives north of Chattanooga and I work in Georgia.

    Work sucked per usual. I had to find a ride home and I called up my friend who I figured since he fucked up and didn't listen to my advice the least he could do was give me a ride. Nope. I called my dad and he didn't have a car. Of course. Come to find out he sent my uncle and I rode with him home.

    I'm so glad to be home, sitting in my own room, crying but content that as soon as this week is over next week will be better. Or shit will just get worse. It couldn't POSSIBLY get any worse than it did today unless my father dies, my mother gets raped, my sister has a miscarriage, or I contract hiv somehow.

    I hate my life. I hate it so goddamn much.

    And to think, all the drama in my life involves furries. Is this a coincidence? Probably, but it doesn't change the fact that this entire week has made me rethink why I'm in the fandom in the first place...

    I guess I'll never know. But I'm surviving. Don't get me wrong, it hurts... it hurts a lot. It makes you grimace in pain, it makes you cry your eyes out, it makes you scream obscenities and it makes you want to die... but as long as you keep on keeping on you'll live. To quote Kevin Smith, "That's what life is: a series of bad endings."

    -KG aka "Skunk"
    Sunday, November 23rd, 2008
    7:55 pm
    I got a friend looking for -cool- furs in the chicago area.

    Cool is defined as not a complete and utter furfag, with decency to keep it in your fucking pants. He had a problem with the last fur he met and it's not my position to give out the details, but it prevented him from going to MFF because he was afraid he was going to get accosted multiple times thinking he's the only furry who knows how to keep it in his pants. To quote "How come all the cool furries live far away from me and I was get the freaky fruity ones?"


    Leave a message here if interested in hearing from him. I figured if you read my journal, you must not be a complete douchebag.

    Non chicago furs, if you know any cool chicago furs, pass the word along and let me know.

    The only fur I know in chicago is Blazger and... well, not going there.

    Anyway, comment here or whatever.
    Friday, November 7th, 2008
    12:34 pm
    Computer got hit hard by spyware.
    It's fixed now.
    Tuesday, November 4th, 2008
    1:07 am
    I miss Ru.



    - crying Skunk
    Wednesday, October 8th, 2008
    11:07 pm
    Hey guys, Tails Radio Show (the podcast like thingy I cohost with my cohost Ash) for our awesome fifth episode wanted to do doing a listener question thingy tommorow... and we have no questions. So, if you'd like your question read out on the show and answered wether you listen to the show or not, send it to tailsradioshow@gmail.com and we will do so.

    Serious, not serious, the good the bad and the downright disgusting, Ash and I have no moral qualms and will talk about anything and since our mailbox is empty there is a 100% chance your letter will get on the air.So, please, send us something. ANYTHING. ^^ And listen to the show, that's more important! http://www.freewebs.com/metalfox117/index.htm
    Saturday, October 4th, 2008
    9:01 pm
    Anyone know where to get fabric dye, preferably cheap?
    Thursday, October 2nd, 2008
    4:10 pm
    Look at FAs main page. See the title bar. WTF?


    I'm instituting an addendum to rule 34:

    34-C. If it exists, there is a furry version.
    34-D. If there is a furry version, there is furry porn of it.
    34-E. If there isn't furry porn of it, Fchan will make it.
    Wednesday, October 1st, 2008
    11:50 pm
    Roses are blue
    Violets are blue
    Being color blind sucks
    And so do you.

    Roses are red
    Canibis is green
    I would have finished this poem but then I got high

    Roses are red
    Pansies are gay
    Don't get aids
    Happy V-Day!

    Roses are red
    Violets are...
    Fuck it, I forgot.

    Blood is red
    Bruises are blue
    To my master
    I love you. Now spank me.

    Roses are red
    So is my pee
    Happy Valentines Day
    I have VD

    Roses are blue
    Violets are red
    Shit, I got it backwards, give me a second.

    Roses are red
    So is the ring
    My Xbox is dead
    GOD I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT IT

    Roses are red
    Their pedals are thin
    When you have premartial sex
    Jesus died for that sin

    Roses are red
    That's all I got.

    Red are the roses
    Blue are the violets
    Can we put an end to war
    and stop all the violence?

    Roses are red
    Violets are purple
    Ever notice no words
    ever rhyme with purple?

    Violets are blue
    Roses are red
    Except during winter
    They're brown cause they're dead

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    Stop fucking around and let's fuck.

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    I'm wearing a fursuit
    I'm gonna rape you

    Roses are red
    Violets are blue
    So is the sky
    And my balls too

    Orses aer erd
    Violtes rae bleu
    Dylesxia sukcs
    Fukc ti, i giev pu

    Roses are the color of red
    In which they are not blue like violets
    Sugar has a sweet flavor to it I happen to like
    I also happen to like you as well by coincidence

    Roses are red
    Poems are lame
    Oh, shit! A zombie
    NOW I CRAVE BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN
    Friday, September 19th, 2008
    12:13 pm
    Tails! Episode 2! Download it now!
    http://www.freewebs.com/metalfox117/archive.htm
    YAY! Episode 2 is up guys!
    Also, song listings for Episodes 1 and 2!
    Listen in and post on our forums!
    -Skunk
    Saturday, September 13th, 2008
    12:24 am
    Tails! A New Furry Radio Show
    http://www.freewebs.com/metalfox117/index.htm
    Episode 1 is up! Listen! Comment! Think happy thoughts!
    Thursday, September 11th, 2008
    12:07 am
    Okay, here we go. Here's the answers, can't tell you the questions, blah blah blah.

    1. [info]bucktowntiger
    2. [info]jouva
    3. [info]djgenki
    4. [info]pshaw_raven, although I hope not.
    5. [info]techkitsune
    6. [info]whiteclaw NEENER
    7. [info]sethcat666
    8. [info]pathia
    9. [info]darzi_j
    10. [info]pshaw_raven
    11. Flux, and I don't have his damn LJ.
    12. [info]foxglovefur
    13. [info]djgenki
    14. [info]pathia
    15. [info]battyvitae
    16. [info]oldfreek
    17. [info]whiteclaw
    18. [info]djgenki
    19. [info]canis_lupis8
    20. [info]sethcat666
    21. I dunno what that means.
    22. Same with this one.
    23. [info]oldfreek
    24. [info]tiltwolfe
    25. [info]djgenki
    26. [info]whiteclaw
    27. [info]pshaw_raven
    28. [info]isfacat
    29. [info]isfacat
    30. Unless the answers I got from someone else were false... this should be correct. But fundamentally I could have put whatever I wanted right here, then made my own questions, or changed some questions, and anyone who had known the original questions would ever be the wiser. The new people would be clueless too because of course I would send them MY key, not anyone elses.
    Question 21 and 22 were odd and I didn't get them. I assumed what they were and decided that since I didn't know I better not fill in what I thought I knew. But I could have just said fuck it, threw in two people right there, and later make up whatever I want.
    Anyway, if you're on the list I suppose you're tagged. If you want the answers I got 'em right here.
    I don't care if you do it or not. I was just being nice to Whiteclaw.
    http://gossymer.livejournal.com/235176.html
    Tuesday, September 2nd, 2008
    9:30 am
    ARGGH
    It's like 9:30 in the morning, I gotta go to class soon :(
    So this is what PCD feels like.


    Anyway, I met waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too many people to remember, but I'll give it my best shot.
    xander, whiteclaw, vitae, tilt, the other tilt, tigerwolf, tigerpaw, lilpup, tigris, goliath, cobalt, isfa, twilight, wings, pistol, charles, baka, flux, rummy, joy... this is going to take a while... I give up. You all know who you are, you silly guys and gals.

    I LOVE YOU ALL! <3
    Wednesday, August 27th, 2008
    7:08 pm
    DOUBLE FANUCCI

    FCD#3 RULES v2
    FLATHEAD EDITION

    SETTING UP THE GAME:
    The dealer, also known as the deckmaster, shuffles the cards and deals four to everyone, then decides the direction of play with either the person on his left or right. The cards are placed in the center of the table and the first card on top is discarded. Once there are no cards in the deck and the discard pile the round ends and a winner is determined. If in one play you run out of cards, you are dealt four new cards automatically.

    HOW TO WIN:
    Gain 1000 points before a round ends.
    Have the most points at the end of the round.
    Use the Indefensible Gambit (see gambits at the bottom)

    NUMBER CARDS
    The cards are numbered from 0 to 9 and also infinity. This means there are eleven cards per suit. These are the values of the cards, which may change depending on the suit. For simplisitic purposes infinity cards are worth 10 points.

    SUITS OF CARDS
    There are 15 different suits.
    TOPS - Tops are simply worth what they're worth.
    ZURFS - If your name starts with Z, add one point to the number value on the card.
    PLUNGERS - Plungers are simply worth what they're worth.
    FROMPS - Fromps are simply worth what they're worth, but if you discard a fromp you gain a point for doing so.
    RAINS - Rains are simply worth what they're worth.
    MAZES - Mazes are worth what they're worth normally but are NEGATIVE in Combines. Negative 0 is still 0 though.
    LAMPS - Lamps are worth what they're worth but due to being a light source any play containing a lamp cannot be nerfed by a grue.
    SCYTHES - Scythes are simply worth what they're worth.
    INKBLOTS - Inks are simply worth what they're worth except 6 and 9 which are worth 9 and 6 respectively. Damn multiple personality disorders.
    HIVES - Hives are tricky. Evens are worth normal, odds are worth double. Infinites are worth 0, 0s are worth negative 1.
    TIME - Time cards are simply worth what they're worth, unless the value is the same as the hour it currently it is. Then it's worth double. Infinites are wilds. Time is infinite, after all. Lunch time doubly so.
    SMILEY - Smiley cards are worth what they're worth.
    EARS - Ears are worth what they're worth.
    BUGS - Odds are worth what they're worth, evens are worth half.
    BOOKS - Books are worth double in all cases.

    FACE CARDS
    Face cards have no suit, have special abilities, and are worth certain points.

    GRANOLA - It's a bowl of granola. Worth 0, but is an automatic trump target. Any time someone wants to trump you, they have to trump the granola.
    DEATH - Worth 10 points. When played in any kind of play, you can take one card from the other player's hands and discard it.
    LIGHT - Worth 5 points. Automatically negates grue cards used against you while it is in play.
    SNAIL - Worth 2 points. The player who plays after you do takes too long and his turn is skipped. The snail moves to him. He doesn't gain the points, but the effect will go around the room until the card is removed from play.
    BEAUTY - Worth 4 points. All girls at the table also get an additional 2 points.
    TIME - Worth as many points as the hour you play it in. If it's 11:59 it's worth 11 points, if it's 1:02 it's worth 1. The points do not change.
    GRUE - There are three ways to play the grue card. One is to cheat with it (see below). The second is to play as a normal card face up worth 10 points. The third is to force a player to discard a play and replace it with the face down grue card worth 0. You can also use it to negate the effects of any other face card except light. If used on snail, the snail is eaten. If the lights are turned off before you can play the card, YOU are eaten by a grue and must restart from the begining.
    LOBSTER - Worth 5 points, but you can't use with with anything else. It must be played as a single play.
    JESTER - Jesters are wild and can be anything except a face card.

    LEGAL PLAYS
    On each play, you must announce exactly what you are doing. One play is equal to one turn.

    DRAW - You can only draw a new card at the begining of your turn if you have less than four cards. If you announce you're drawing, then realise you already have four cards, you end your turn and everyone else in the game gets 5 points. You can only draw one card per turn.
    DISCARD - You can discard at the begining of your turn. You forfeit your turn but you may discard as many cards as you want. If you discard all of your cards you may buy one card for five points. Discarding your cards, unlike playing them, has no effect on other players.
    SINGLE-PLAY - Play one card, gain that many points.
    DOUBLE-PLAY - Play two cards, gain that many points. If you only have two cards left you may draw another card for free.
    DIVIDE - Pick two cards that the numbers are divisible by themselves with no remainders, such as 6 and 3. Hold both cards, announce you're dividing. They're counted as the divided answer (2 in this case) and you gain that many points. Mark them with a Red gem to show they are discarded. There are special rules to diving zero and infinite. If you divide by zero, everyone's hands are taken and shuffled together then dealt back out evenly.
    REVERSE - Pick one card. You get the opposite ammount of points. When you reverse a card, you also reverse direction of turns. Mark the reversed card with a Blue gem to show it is reversed.
    TRUMP - Find another play on the table that is equal in points to the card you want to play as if you were playing the trump card as a single play. Ie the divided 6 and 3 above is worth two points so you trump it with a 2. You discard that play and they lose that many points but you gain no points. Afterwards, discard the trump card.
    UNDERTRUMP - Trump one of your own plays, take another turn.
    COMBINE - If the sum of the points of all of the cards you want to play is equal to ten, you can combine them. Mark combines with a Green gem. You gain twenty points.
    PASS - Forfeit your turn, pick up five points.
    OVERPASS - You must have a poker straight (consecutive numbers) in order to play an overpass. Announce you're overpassing, discard the cards in order while counting. You gain no points but make the next person lose a turn.
    MUTTONATE - If you muttonate a card, it is placed in another player's play area with a Black gem. They lose that many points.
    IONIZE - Discard the card, everyone including you loses that many points.
    CHEAT - For a cost of ten points and discarding your card, you can cheat!
    * Look at another players hand.
    * Draw an extra card that turn.
    * Exchange scores with someone else.
    * Turn the discard pile into the draw pile and vice versa.
    * Exchange hands with someone else.
    * Play a Triple Play!
    * Ignore all cheat card effects in place. See below.

    CHEAT CARD EFFECTS
    These cards are special. Cheat with them, and get special effects! These cards are placed on the other side of the deck opposite of the discard pile. Only one of these effects may be in place, so when one gets replaced the previous effect is over. This discard pile can be moved to the normal discard pile to negate any effects by using the last cheat rule above.
    * Cheat with the Grue card, cause a player to restart from the begining again. They discard their entire hand and all their plays, draw four new cards, and their score is reset to zero.
    * Cheat with the 3 of Fromps, no one wins. Everyone loses. You suck.
    * Cheat with the Seven of Smilies. No one is allowed to sit anymore. STAND UP!
    * Cheat with the Granola card. The game pauses and everyone goes to get something to eat and come back. Anyone who doesn't come back with food or refuses to leave loses all of their points because they died of starvation. Drinks are optional.
    * Cheat with the Lobster. You have permission to pinch the player of your choice.
    * Cheat with the Light. The grue card is discarded entirely for the rest of the game and gets it's own special discard pile.
    * Cheat with the Snail card. All double plays that have been played are now split into single plays and the lowest value is sent to the discard pile and the players lose that many points. If both values are the same they both get discarded.
    * Cheat with the Beauty card and cast KENDALL! The rest of the game becomes draw one play one.
    * Cheat with the Time card. Everyone wearing a watch loses 5 points. If anyone asks the players what time it is they MUST say it's 4:30, or lose an additional five points.
    * Cheat with the Jester and cast LLADNEK! The rest of the game is now hand limit of three cards, draw five, play two, face cards are worth nothing, and if you double play the Grue and the Light you win!
    * Cheat with the Infinite Ears or the Naught of Books. No one is allowed to speak.

    GAMBIT PLAYS
    These plays are a bit strange, but if you can pull them off you'll do weird things!

    THE INDEFENSIBLE GAMBIT: Undertrump three times while a 3 of Fromps is on top of the discard pile and you win automatically.
    THE JESTERS GAMBIT: Do a double play with the 0 of Tops and any other Naught card. Worth zero. Take half the deck, turn it over, place it in the discard pile.
    THE PLUMBERS GAMBIT: Do an overpass play with a nine of plungers. If you can produce at that point two rubber duckies double your points.
    THE INSIDE DUO GAMBIT: Discard the Lobster, count up all your negative points and add half to your score. Math is important, after all.

    ILLEGAL PLAYS
    - You can never undertrump the Snail.
    - You can never muttonate a single top unless it is a two person game.
    - You can never double play the Time face card.
    - You can never cheat Death.
    - You can never divide infinites. You CAN divide by zero.
    Thursday, June 12th, 2008
    9:50 pm
    THE PROBLEM I FORSEE
    Robert Englund is going to be at Dragoncon.

    So... the problem I forsee... the choice...

    A. An opportunity to meet my favorite actor, the man who played Freddy Krueger.
    B. NOT go to Dragoncon and go to a convention that isn't as big, be with people I know and can trust, and save money: Memphit Fur Meet, THE skunk themed furry convetion.

    OH GOD I CAN'T CHOOSE I MEAN IT'S FREDDY KRUEGER! He's like my favorite character EVER! And this is a chance to meet the man! Get stuff signed! Maybe even an opportunity to establish a contact for when I complete a film! I mean, ya never know, this could be the jumpstart to my film career! He might even be able to dispense some helpful advice! Sure, he's a major horror and sci fi film star so he's going to be hounded like crazy but you never know when I might be able to luck out and sit down with the man for a beer!

    Buuuuuuuuut... it's Dragoncon. Ewww! I don't even want to go after the stories I heard!

    IT'S DRIVING ME NUTS!
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